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Written by The Big Train
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Tuesday, 04 August 2009 10:11 |
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It has been a busy off-season so far for the Magic, as well as the rest of the league. That said, we have gotten a bit off track with some of our ongoing pieces. Fortunately, today we continue TPASTBM's post-season player grades. This is what we have so far:
So, next up: Anthony Johnson.

Name: Johnson, Anthony
Stats: Mr. Johnson started 12 out of the 80 games he played in during the regular season. He averaged 5.3 points a contest on 40% shooting from the field and 39% from three point land. He added 2.5 assists per game, .6 steals, and 1.8 rebounds.
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Written by The Nickel Steak
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Tuesday, 04 August 2009 08:56 |
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Here is the challenge: Create the best possible lineup from Magic players, past and present in their primes.
So here are the rules:
1. You get a 15 player lineup. Positions can be determined however you want to determine them. So if you want to have 9 centers on the roster, more power to you.
2. All players are in their primes. That player's prime did NOT have to occur while on the Magic. Mark Price is 1992 Mark Price, for instance, not broken down in Orlando Mark Price.
3. Consider all facets of the game. A team of great scorers that doesn't play defense isn't necessarily better than a team that is just "good" at everything.
4. Put your bias away. If a player's history with Orlando isn't necessarily a positive one, don't discredit the player because of it. Be open minded.
Here is mine:
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Written by Maxwell Effort
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Friday, 24 July 2009 08:42 |
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So in honor of Lebron getting "dunked" on by Jordan Crawford ESPN decided to roll out their list of Top 10 "poster" dunks which can be found here.
I really do not know what criteria they use to establish lists nor do I care but this might be one of the worst I have ever seen. The reason for this is of course the King. They basically ruined the whole segment by placing a Lebron dunk on Tim Duncan at number one. Really every other dunk in there was spectacular but the way they kiss up to Lebron is hilarious. He is the best basketball player in the NBA and you run the sports landscape. It is not like you two are going to turn your back on each other. Do not insult our intelligence by dumbing things down for us. We know you do not make money off Michael Jordan anymore but be serious. I think it is even an insult to Lebron to even consider this dunk at number one. Get your Coors Light Cold Hard Facts right!
Also shouldn't your defender have to be making an attempt to block the shot to be considered a "poster" dunk. I am pretty sure your three thousand production assistants and interns could have done better. It took me 2 minutes to get the 2 dunks below that are way better by simply searching this little upstart website named youtube.
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Written by PUNS TEAM
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Thursday, 23 July 2009 09:42 |
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As we get into the real doldrums of the NBA offseason and the Magic's roster for the most part has taken shape we wonder aloud about chemistry.
Chemistry is something that is always brought up when it is perceived that a team may have made one to many changes or that they let go of their perceived "glue guy" which in this case would be Hedo Turkoglu.
We all love Hedo. He eats pizza, he talks funny, heck he even raps now. We heard about how he made numerous jokes in the lockerroom and generally kept everyone loose. Clearly the players wanted him to stay and Dwight also lamented the loss of his "older and younger brothers" Tony Battie and Courtney Lee.
Vince Carter who has become an afterthought in New Jersey has been seen as a me-first player and quitter mostly based on his last couple of seasons in Toronto. The truth is he was beloved by his teammates in New Jersey as well as their management. Couple that with the additions of Brandon Bass, Ryan Anderson, Matt Barnes and maybe one or two more role players and was this to much to soon.
Well we asked some oft he PUNS cast to weigh in on this item and here is how they felt.
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Written by The Big Train
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Wednesday, 22 July 2009 08:43 |
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While perusing the Internet, I came across an article at NESN written by Liam Martin punderfully (that's a mix between pun and wonderful, btw) titled "No Magic in Orlando's Offseason Moves." It is an attempt to critique Orlando's moves since they lost in The Finals to the Lakers in 5. The keyword here is attempt. I can sum it up by saying my 4 year-old kid possess more logic than Mr. Martin... And I don't even have a kid.

I guess you should read the article first, but I don't know if it is worth giving NESN the traffic. After the jump, we'll start from the beginning:
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Written by El Fantasma De Carlos
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Tuesday, 21 July 2009 07:25 |
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Otis Smith. We love you. We trust you. We want you. We need you. The man has been criticized, kicked, punched, spit on, insulted, and assaulted by the media and fans. Online by many blogs, reporters and forums. On print by many newspapers and magazines. He pressed on. Never swayed from his plan. Keeping an eye on the prize.
The Magic nation once again had a taste of the glory that comes with reaching the NBA Finals. The city of Orlando had not been so excited about a sporting event since, well the 1995 NBA Finals. The city came together, everyone jumped on the fun and love it or hate it, the bandwagon fans made the playoffs very exciting for all of us. The energy around town was amazing. I want more. We need more.
Otis has done it again. This off-season has been busy for the Magic. Otis was given a green light to go out there and just build the best team ever to play in a Magic uniform. He hasn't disappointed. Started with the bold move of moving the very promising Courtney Lee, Tony Battie and Rafer Alston to the Nets for Vince Carter and Ryan Anderson. People where outraged. I was one of them. How can you trade Lee? I thought, here we go again, Magic wasting away talent (think Harpring, Wallace, Miller, etc). But I dealt with it. I was trying to trust Otis' plan. He didn't let Hedo walk away for nothing. Another brilliant move. He went after Brandon Bass, the strong true PF everyone and their grandma thought the team needed. He made Cuban and the Mavs look like fools by matching Gortat's offer sheet. A move nobody thought would be made. "There's no way the Magic will go over the cap", people said. The fact that he made Mark Cuban look like an idiot was just icing on the cake, and I love it. Most people would say, man that was a good off-season, we are looking better.
Otis wasn't done. The latest news as previously reported. CJ Watson and Matt Barnes are on the payroll. Barnes is official. Watson will sign the offer sheet and Golden State probably won't match it.
In Otis we Trust. Perhaps it was the run to the Finals. Maybe having the best center in the NBA in Dwight Howard. Or maybe currently having 4 All-Star caliber players in the starting lineup. But players are noticing that the Magic are no joke. Guys once again want to come here to win. You can say all you want about Otis, he maybe overpaid for Lewis. A year ago it looked like he overpaid for Nelson. He let Arroyo, Dooling, Darko, and others go without getting anything back which was questionable. He traded Trevor Ariza for nothing although that is not entirely true. But the man has a plan. His vision took us to the Finals. His moves this off-season prove that he has become a very smart GM. He knows what he is doing. I say let him do his thing people. I trust him with my team. I will not question his moves ever again. The man wants to win. The man will deliver us to the promise land. In Otis we Trust.

Otis Smith image courtesy of the Orlando Sentinel. In Otis we trust! Sticker image courtesy of davcivic from orlandomagiczone.com |
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Page 6 of 25 |
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Image of the day: Via Orlando Sentinel
The Mission. The Statement.
We are Terry and The Pump Fakes, Jareth Cutestory, Vile Feminista, Maxwell Effort, I 3 Freely, Paul Ego, Supply and Demand, El Fantasma de Carlos, The Big Train, The Nickel Steak, Ayo!, and Tyson J. Perfect. Together, we are Magic fans. We remember Nick’s steal against Jordan, Billy Donovan, Scott Skiles, Jerryl Sasser and Reece Gaines, The Mac Attacks, the NBA on NBC, and Grant Hill’s ankle. We also watch TV and read the internet, thus noticing the endless flow of unoriginal Orlando Magic related puns. We have combined to discuss the Magic, the NBA, and from time to time supply side economics and the life of Leonardo da Vinci. Together we are The Puns Are Starting to Bore Me.
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